Today is all about drinking stale Franziskaner from yesterday, looping GRUNT video and thinking, what to make of the past couple of days. Also, laughing out loud while reading the first review of the fest. “It is music, which one would enjoy listening on February”, says the “reviewer”. “The performance was going ritually (?), the artist made a connection with the audience by putting up her hands, whip or using body language”, – he adds. Actually, when you translate it, it sounds way better – in Lithuanian it is just amateur gibberish – something like “I like sounds and words, they make me feel various kinds of emotions, I am interested in emotions. Emotions are something you feel”.
As I said before, probably nobody in the scene is here for money, fame or some other kind of physical form of feedback. Even if there is some kind of plus in the budget of one event, other event most definitely will go straight to minus – just to level things up. So it is the scene, it is the people, it is the conversations here which is the main thing, why the scene is alive. Somehow, all the people of the post/industrial are interesting and intelligent and overall, the ones you respect in one or another way – even if you met them for the first time. Because most of the time, the values are similar, the basics are similar, the mentality is similar, no matter which nationality they are or from which continent they came.
Music purges the way one thinks – if you “get” the noise, you will “get” the constructs of thinking and meanings which are hiding behind it. It it not something you can verbalize. And since basically everything is subjective, the only way to understand your surroundings, closest to truth, is empirical. Act, try, enjoy, hate, experience, because there is no Truth, only your truth. Just as there are no good or bad things, just things. Porn, religion, guns, flowers, pink, heels, srpski film, lady gaga, the gremlins – all the same. Some you may like, some may not, but that does not mean that they are good or bad. I am right in my context, others are right in their context – if only the person who judges makes an effort of creating his/her own mindset on the subject in the first place.
In this manner, three days of SPEIGAS – from discussing the matters of universe to enjoying harsh sound walls, from being pissed off to feeling ecstatic, from doing some work to simply chilling – was an experience which is hard to summarize. Eating soup, watching Boy George and talking about moustaches and sideburns; looking at light pedo+birthing videos; talking about the drone with that random person; throwing up in airport’s restroom; wandering alone in the snow at 4 am. And somewhere between that there is music. I am truly glad that I heard all of the second day performances properly, because all of them were deadly intense, dynamic and overall brilliant. But usually those who are involved in organizing don’t see too much – and if they do, thinking parallelly if everything is ok is pretty distracting. (I am not talking about small events – those happen almost by themselves if only the PA is ok:) So it is important to get as much feedback from those who concentrate to the performances. And hearing that “it is semi-good to listen to noise on February” is not that helpful. BECAUSE IT IS OK TO LISTEN TO NOISE IN OCTOBER, TOO. It is important to hear some real critique, some real pointing out what was good and what was not – let’s discuss how to make this thing even better than they are now.
I am saying that, because this SPEIGAS went without any major problems. Most of the bigger events Agharta ever made had some kind of shit going on – fucked up PA, cops, soundguy leaving before the concert, soundguy getting into a fist fight with a musician, musicians not coming to the event, never ending swarms of hipsters trying to get into event because they are on a List of some sort – you name it. And after any event which had any visible problems – visible for the audience (for example, sound system not working properly) – there was close to zero feedback. And if somebody write a review, it was mostly concentrating on irrelevant aspects, or totally ignoring the bad parts. Last year after SPEIGAS, the main idea of reviews was “Well, the industrial scene was fantastic, the witch house had problems – but at least they tried:)”. Trying is not enough – it makes me feel that people doesn’t even know why they come to this kind of concerts. It is not only about organizing – it is about reviewing performances, records and all of that.
It is no secret that here in Lithuania, there are not much people who write, discuss or overall try to verbalize the scene – writing reviews, criticizing organizing and performing, recording or creating visuals. I am not saying that I am the one who is good at talking about this – firstly, because I am
a woman not a performer myself and base my texts on emotion. But I know that I am way better now in understanding all of this than I was when I started to write about events three years ago. In a way – this is the problem – those, only those, who do not know shit are heard, and those who should be talking/writing, are silent. Most of the time, people tend to keep their opinion to themselves – mostly because they don’t want to insult their friends since everybody knows each other (wild guess:) ). But this is not how it should work – friends do want their friends to improve. And it should be a matter of respect to tell the people your opinion – that is if you have one. And it is up to those people who get the feedback to listen to it or say that “Your opinion is shit and you don’t know what you are talking about, go and wrestle with bears till death”.
Last three days were strange, exhausting, fulfilling, and making me remember, why I am where I am in the first place. Because of the people who share and have similar values, and you don’t really feel the need to discuss that – because you already know that you are in the right place, with the right people, with the right amount of respect for each other. What you need to discuss – how to make place you are in a better one. Because the society around you is fucked, so since you are among a few people who actually are intelligent and interesting, try to make the best of it.